Goals and Gains

And so it is done! At 3:57 PM yesterday I typed "The End" and found myself with 50K + 71 words of a complete novel. All the major plots and subplots were sketched out, the main characters were developed, and their relationships to each other were at least outlined if not fleshed out.

There wasn't much fanfare with the finale. I wondered around the house. In the living room I encountered four sleeping cats. Two of them raised their heads when they saw me, the other two just lifted open an eyelid.

"I'm done! I won!" I said and raised my arms in the air touchdown like.

They just settled themselves little more deeply into their respective beds then they all went back to sleep.

During this month friends have occassionally asked, "So, what is it that you get when you win?" To which I had to keep answering, "Nothing." And that is the whole point, as far as I'm concerned. You win no thing in doing something like this. The little certificate above is a file you download. You fill in your own name and then you can do with it what you will. What I "won" was watching myself be consistent and committed to something I had never done before. I developed the stamina and backbone to write something even when the scene I was facing was two characters in chairs facing each other and I had no idea what they were going to say to one another. I kept daily word count goals even when I found it hard to do. I managed to do this in the midst of work, home life, attendance at a conference in Seattle, and Thanksgiving.

And here was the most important thing I did all month long. When I typed "The End" and saw that I had passed the 50K mark, I simply stopped. I had completed what I set out to do.

There is a verse in the Tao Te Ching which reads:

Better stop short than fill to the brim.

Oversharpen the blade, and the edge will soon blunt.

Amass a store of gold and jade, and no one can protect it.

Claim wealth and titles and disaster will follow.

Retire when the work is done.

This is the way of heaven.

This speaks directly to the cautions of trying to acquire fame and gain for oneself. The Buddha was very clear that seeking recognition and glory is one of the surest ways to find suffering in your life. It leads to jealousy, greed, competition (and therefore setting oneself to be better than another.) I never felt the need to be in competition with anyone else. I had my goal and when it was reached I put down the pen. I can pick it up any time I want to in the future when/if it seems good to begin to edit. In this way I do not feel burnt out, stressed out or anxious. Knowing when to stop is as valuable as knowing when to begin.

For now, what is good to do is come back to my life as it is, catch up on housecleaning, cootch my kitties. I am deeply grateful for this experience and yes, I'll be back next year!

(Lynn's novel, "Touching the Velvet Elvis," was fueled by vast amounts of caffeine in many forms and by the good folk at pandora.com and their awsome online radio station!)